Monday was not suppose to be my rest day especially given my hectic class schedule. However, the day at the office was emotionally draining and my Sunday sleep was just not wonderful. Also I was still feeling some soreness in my calves from my lack of hydration this weekend.
I was self-talking myself in every possible to talk myself into going out running. But the feeling of overwhelming, out of nowhere exhaustion, just kept pulling me back. I used the “I only have a few weeks left” and the “I need to run because I can’t run again until Wednesday” and even went so far as to say “SUCK IT UP BUTTERCUP” The capital letters weren’t for visually dramatic effect, I actually said it loudly and authoritatively, sadly (or humorously) it was said while Jesi was driving so there is a slight possibility that I scared the lights out of her.
I ended up agreeing with Jesi that if I had to fight that HARD to motivate myself and that the exhaustion was so deep that I should listen to my body and just take a rest day unexpectedly. While I do need to get the miles in and there really are only a few weeks, I won’t get to race day if I run myself into the ground now.
Even though I haven’t always hit the exact miles I need through this training plan, I still continue to go out and train and get in what I can. Jesi gently reminded me that this is the most consistent and focused I have been in the six years that I have done marathons.
I feel like I am vacillating between accepting that I needed a rest day and fighting the feeling that I am making excuses because I didn’t want to run. It is a struggle, especially with less than a month to go. I am finding the mental struggle is becoming more of an issue than the muscle soreness that is beginning to set in.
For the next few weeks, I am going to work on my mental strength as well as my running strength. I’m going to work on finding that place deep inside that will help me push through the dark places that creep up when I am tired and feeling like a petulant two year old.
Have you ever had those days were you felt like a toddler needing a nap? How did you push through? Share in the comments below.